Charisma is that elusive quality that makes us more attractive and inspires action or even devotion in others. That’s pretty powerful, right? Especially when we need to lead a group of people, champion a cause or host a memorable event.
Boost your charisma with these 5 things that naturally charismatic people do.
Embrace Your Imperfections
Focusing on your flaws just winds you up like a cheap toy and prevents people feeling comfortable around you.
Charismatic people make others feel accepted because they’ve accepted themselves, warts and all. Embracing your imperfections frees you to be yourself around others, which is one of the most attractive qualities there is.
Ask the Most Interesting Questions
The saying, “Bored people are boring people” suggests the converse must be true: “Interested people are interesting people”. Charismatic people make a habit of practicing curiousity about others’ lives by asking the most interesting questions. Here’s how to ask the best questions:
1. Don’t ask yes or no questions
2. Ask why and follow-up questions
3. Use the power of silence – psychologists use prolonged silence to coax clients to share more
4. Don’t interrupt
Gush, Don’t Gossip
Studies show that when you gossip, the negative things you’ve said about someone else become associated with you too! Stop shooting yourself in the foot and rather be generous about other people in conversation. Those positive things you’ve pointed out in others will stick in your listeners’ perceptions of you too.
The most popular TED talks have been studied to find out why we engage more with certain speakers.
Speakers with a higher frequency of hand gestures tend to be favoured over those who are less expressive.
Improve your charisma by intentionally increasing the number and variety of hand gestures you use. You’ll also keep your listeners engaged for longer.
We all know that look on people’s faces when they’re nodding and looking at us, but they’re actually thinking, “Monster trucks!”. Charismatic people look intently at the people they’re listening to, allowing our brains to recognise that this person is engaging with us.
Improve your eye contact by “deep gazing” – if you focus on noticing the person’s eye colour you will better communicate that you’re listening well.
What are your other tips for improving charisma? Share your comments below!